Changing the terms on us

Eugene Volokh has an excellent post on the confusing practice of changing terms that refer to groups of people. He concludes:

5. So I think the approach that's more tolerant of speakers, ultimately more likely to avoid offense to the subjects of the speech, and less likely to be subject to the whims of a small minority of activists is generally to tolerate both the old terms and the new terms, and not consider either to be a breach of good manners. [emphasis in original]

Generally, "If you change the term for your group and you don't tell me, don't get mad if I slip up later". Or something like that. I suggest reading the whole post to see how he gets to that point.