The Twelve Caesars - page 78, Augustus

In one period of exceptional scarcity [Augustus] found it impossible to cope with the public distress except by expelling every useless mouth from the city, such as the slaves in the slave-market, all members of gladiatorial schools, all foreign residents with the exception of physicians and teachers, and a number of household-slaves.


Slaves? Useless mouths? I would have thought that slaves would actually be quite useful. You know, as free labor. That's kind of the reason they were made slaves in the first place, right? Sure, get rid of the foreign residents, I can understand that, but why cast out all the slaves?

And really, the gladiators, too? C'mon, Augustus, what were the people supposed to do without their sports?


Next year, I go free agent, and then I'm takin' my talents to South Beach.